Believin’

Everyone has moments in their lives that when you hear a certain song, you’re brought back to a place.  Most of the time, this is pretty solid for me.  I hear Piano Man, I think of my friends from college.  I hear the Beatles and I think of my senior year of college.  I hear something by Rusted Root and suddenly I’m painting in art class again.

All those songs have one moment.  They have one flash in my mind of why I like them.

As I was driving home from Cape Cod on Tuesday night (HI I GOT TOO MUCH SUN AND MY SKIN HURTS), I was scanning all of the radio stations.  Mostly because I could and I was bored and I needed something to do on my 4 hour drive.  I didn’t know what I was looking for, but I knew I would find something.

And Don’t Stop Believin’ came on.  Steve Perry was belting it out with so much heart and soul.  So I belted it out too.  I screamed it at the top of my lungs.  I rocked out hardcore on I-195 because I could.

The more I thought about that song, the more I realized that it doesn’t have just ONE moment in my life.  It has many moments.  I don’t know if that’s due to how popular it is, or just what sort of radio stations I listen to, but there’s so many things that came flying back to me at that moment:

– Driving home late one night with my friends and my brother after seeing Red Eye.  We heard this song, all rolled down our windows and sang it like that was what we were put on the earth to do.
– My cousin Kit’s wedding, where I danced so much with my grandma that she couldn’t walk the next day.
– Being in Vermont with 21.  We had just said goodbye to Tessa and Aaron and were walking back to the couch.  The song came on.  21 went over to the radio, cranked it up as high as it could go and we sang it to each other and danced around.  When the song was over, we went back to our lives
– Singing it out at Mike and Casey’s wedding, while dancing around with Gilmore and feeling so alive
– Glee. Because of course.
– Being on a cruise with Karen and Pam (although I don’t think we sung this song, it just reminds me of that moment)

It’s weird to think that just one song brings up so much in my life. But it’s THAT song. The song that has carried me through years of my life. It’s too bad that it has to be a bad 80s song, but at least it has a new message – Don’t Stop Believin’

Reverb Day 25 – Photo

Prompt: Photo – a present to yourself. Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you.

There aren’t a lot of photos from me this year – or so it seems.

This photo was taken at my friends wedding.  She had a photo booth and wanted all the bridesmaids to get silly and creative with it. I know I’ve mentioned this before.  So here we all are, showing what too much metal for just one bridal party is.

I like this picture because it’s fun and silly.  We’re all having so much fun.  That’s what I want to remember from this year – the fun.  The good times, which certainly outweighed the bad times this year.

This picture shows me as I am – always the instigator, always ready for fun and always the troublemaker.  And I’m okay with that.

Reverb Day 24 – Everything’s okay

Prompt: Everything’s OK. What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead?

The only moment that can serve as proof that everything is okay is the fact that moments keep on happening.  I keep on waking up and going to work and seeing my friends and having fun.  If things weren’t okay, that wouldn’t happen.

Stuff gets hard.  Times get tough.  But even when I was thinking that stuff couldn’t get worse, there would be a glimmer of hope.  I might laugh so hard at someone that I cried.  I might have lots of fun sitting on the couch all night with one of my friends.  I might meet a boy that amuses me, if only for a moment.

As long as moments, even if few and far between, keep on happening, that’s how I know it’s going to be okay.  As long as I get butterflies from seeing 21, I have friends that make me laugh and smile, I’ve got a family that might be insane, but they are still mine – things are going to be okay.

Everything else between those moments that’s good and wonderful?  that’s just a bonus

 

Reverb Day 12 – Body movin’

Prompt: Body integration. This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present?

Can I just say that I think this is a really..uh..dumb question? Like honestly. How do you even answer this? I got this question via email last night on my blackberry a little after midnight. I was standing in 21’s kitchen and I was making a weird confused face after reading the email. He was like “what is wrong with you?”

What’s wrong is this question.

Anyway. I don’t know if there’s really a good answer for this question. I did spend many afternoons this summer working with my personal trainer. She’s one of my most favorite people in the world. She knows how to push me and what to say to make me try harder.

For about 2 months, I was seeing her 3-4 times a week. She was having me do things that I never thought I’d be able to do. I could feel myself getting stronger, having more endurance and feeling more confident about myself. I can’t say the last time that I felt that good.

When Lisa was having me running sprints and doing jump jacks and planks and I could do it. WITHOUT BEING TOO WINDED AND DYING? That was an amazing feeling. Because that meant that everything I had been doing had paid off.

This summer flew by before I even knew it. But the way that my body developed and changed is something that I won’t soon forget.

And now? I’ve got ab muscles. They might be beneath a layer of protective karate fat, but they are THERE.

Reverb Day 8 – I’m a funny girl

In case maybe you missed it, almost all my blog posts during the month of December are inspired by Reverb ’10

Today’s prompt – Beautifully different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful.

When I got this email, I was out working in the Field and got really excited. Yes I can be that lame. Don’t judge.

I’m not sure what I could say that makes me different. I think that I just am different. I know stupid things about me that make me a little bit different: I laugh at things that might not be funny – I giggle whenever 21 kisses me – I sometimes try to reason with myself out loud – whenever I get bored with life, I decide to bake – I have a love affair with Tony Stark (yes, Iron Man) – I miss my college town so bad that it hurts sometimes – I’m a walking disaster.

But do those things light people up? Probably not. Except for the fact I’m a walking disaster. That’s always a shining light. Whenever I call someone to tell them about how a I walked into a filing cabinet? I bet they laugh.

The one thing that probably does is Best of Sarah. (Time for a shameless plug!) My roommate/soupsnake/very very good friend started this blog about 2 years ago. We would email each other from work and I would say ridiculous things. She would then forward the ridiculous things to people she knew. They would laugh and laugh. So then she decided that she should just cut out the middle man…and have a blog. So the Best of Sarah was born.

I know whenever I’m feeling a bit down or not pleased with myself, I read BoS. Everything is right with the world. Because honestly? I’M FUNNY. Or mostly funny.

I know that I am good at making people smile. I know that I can cut tension in the room by just cracking a simple joke. And honestly, some of the worst times in my life, when I’ve been crying hysterically and thinking how much of a wreck my life is, I’m still laughing at something.

I’m going to say that my sense of humor lights up someone’s life. And if not? At least it lights up mine.