A silly thing to be upset about turns into something else entirely

I’ve had the same trainer for like, a year now.  She’s wonderful.  I love her.  She gets me and she gets how I work.  She knows how to push me.  And she makes me laugh.

Today she told me that due to her heavy courseload this semester, she cannot train me anymore.

TO say that I was crushed would be barely scraping the surface.  I was crying.  Like a lot.  I feel like she broke up with me – even though I completely understand and I know that’s what she needed to do.  But still – I like her.  I like my time with her.  And now that’s not something I can do anymore.

So after I left her house today, I got in the car and cried.  But I wasn’t just crying about the fact that Lisa isn’t going to be my trainer.  I was crying about the stress from work, stress from things relating to my brother, the way that 21 didn’t come over on Sunday night even though he said he would.  I was crying out of the panic of getting ready to go on vacation when I don’t feel prepared.  I cried because it’s cold outside, the wind is howling and I just want to see some flowers.  I cried because when 21 invited me over for next Monday night, I stupidly told him that V-Day isn’t a big deal.  Because it’s not.  And now who knows what he thinks?

It’s so stupid.  But it’s something that I needed to do.  I needed to cry my eyes out in my car over nothing to realize that I’m stressed out but it will be over soon.

I’ll be on a beach in Mexico soon.  I’ll be in New Orleans even sooner.  The Dog Ball is this weekend and I can’t wait to get all dressed up.  I’m getting a haircut, which always makes me feel fabulous.  I’m going to buy V-Day cards for all my friends and nothing brings me more joy than to send them to my friends.  I might have some ice cream for dessert tonight, which would bring a smile to my face.  And if all else fails, at least tomorrow is Wednesday…which means the week is halfway over.  Thankfully.